Uneasy bedfellows: sex and spirituality

Image courtesy of James Barker/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Religion and spirituality play major roles in my two paranormal romance series, Duals and Donovans: the Different, and Seasons of Sorania Cycle. The witch characters in the Duals and Donovans series pray to the Lord and Lady, the deities representing male and female energy, as part of their spells, and tend to be quite religious. Shapeshifting duals have a direct relationship with the divine, and especially their androgynous patron deity Trickster. One character, Akane (Foxes’ Den) is an avatar of Inari, a Japanese face of Trickster, sent to do Inari’s work on earthly shaking up stuffy order in productive (or at least amusing) ways, and Trickster and Trickster’s avatar Coyote play important roles in the forthcoming Cougar’s Courage. The characters in the Seasons of Sorania Cycle are, for the most part, extremely religious, which is understandable in this imaginary world: the gods and the spirit world play an active role in human lives, so it’s downright foolish not to believe. Adimir and Miryea are brought together thanks to divine intervention in Lady Sun Has Risen and act to bring about the will of the gods and defeat an enemy that has been deceiving humans into thinking it is a god in Threshing the Grain. In A Satyr for Midwinter, Kallios’s  dead lover and the gods themselves work to bring Kallios and Laeca together. Rain at Midsummer centers on a religious ritual that brings rain to a drought-stricken region. (It’s an erotic ritual; I created the world so I got to invent a religion that worked for my plot.)

Yet I have no idea what religious beliefs, if any, Nick and Selene, the hero and heroine of Knowing the Ropes, might have. Same with Drake and Jen in my current work in progress, another kinky contemporary called Out of Control (working title). I realized that gap just the other day, well into the draft of Out of Control, and found myself wondering why I never considered the spirituality of the characters.

Jen and Drake’s religion doesn’t have any obvious bearing on their story—it’s not part of their conflict or their growth as a couple. But considering how much I know about these characters, even if it doesn’t work its way into the book directly, it seems odd I never considered whether Drake is an atheist or a believer of some sort, whether Jen, who creates a Green Man and Spring Goddess sculpture in the book, is a neo-pagan or just drawn to seasonal imagery. I figure Selene in Knowing the Ropes is a Protestant by heritage, simply because she grew up on a grape farm in central New York; the little farm towns in that area have far more Protestant churches than Catholic ones, and other religions are distinctly in the minority. But it never occurred to me to ask myself whether she actively goes to church or prays when she’s troubled—despite the fact that her best friend is a church deacon.

And despite the fact that my own journey to self-acceptance as a sexual submissive involved spiritual searching and, in the end, an evolution in my beliefs. (That’s a topic for another post—or maybe a book.) Knowing the Ropes isn’t autobiographical, but my own experiences should have led me to wonder if Selene’s journey (or Nick’s, for that matter) might include a spiritual or religious dimension.

Religion and sexuality are contentious companions. Just check out any online discussion of marriage equality or reproductive rights. (Better yet, don’t. It’s better for your blood pressure.) Individuals’ religious beliefs, or lack thereof, are important facets of character—defining characteristics, for many people in the real world. But in a realistic book that focuses heavily on sex, especially sex that may push readers out of their comfort zone, I instinctively shy away from introducing religion or spirituality, other often uncomfortable topics. At least I do if it’s real world religion, which presses buttons for many people simply because it is important, and sometimes painful.

The spiritual dimension in my paranormal series, on the other hand, is not drawn from a familiar real-world religion. No one on earth grew up following the gods of Sorania because they’re wholly my invention. While the Donovan witches practice something similar to contemporary Celtic-path paganism, they’re clearly not living in the world we know. (The shapeshifters are a dead giveaway.) The magical element seems to make it all right to talk about the divine and spiritual growth, even in a book rated as “red hot,” and involving menages, BDSM, and sex magic.

In fact, most of the erotic romances I can think of that involve any spiritual or religious element are paranormals. (Joey W. Hill’s angel books are an obvious example.) Most contemporary romances with a spiritual element are sweet inspirationals without explicit sex, and usually no sex at all until a couple marries. I wonder if readers would be open to contemporary erotic romances with a spiritual or religious dimension, since spirituality and sex are both important, and frequently intertwined, aspects of real life.

Can anyone recommend romances that successfully tackle both eroticism and belief? Or would that juxtaposition take a story out of the friendly genre of romance and into the more challenging and uncomfortable realm of “serious” fiction?